(Confronting Content Ahead)
I don’t dwell on what might have happened had I been sent home on day five after my daughter was born. But whenever the news throws up sensational stories reporting murder, infanticide, or suicide, and there is even a slim possibility the perpetrator might have been psychotic – then I think about it. Because that could have been me.
(Confronting content ahead)
One evening about eight years ago:
I pretend to share dinner with my husband on our deck. The air between us is loaded with the conversation we are about to have. I drag my eyes from my untouched food up in his direction and ask:
‘Why can’t you just let me go? Haven’t I suffered enough?’
He explodes:
‘How can you be so selfish? I’d be explaining to our children why you left us for the rest of my life.’
The tiny bit of energy I have left coalesces into a red-hot ball of anger
‘Don’t you dare call me selfish after everything I have been through. Ever! I wouldn’t be leaving you. I’d be doing you all a favour.’
I had plans for this post to be much softer than the last. No politics or indignation…
I started with excellent intentions. I slept in, made banana pancakes for breakfast, a big plunger of coffee, got the paper, and planned to read about the royal wedding preparations, the politics of which I am not particularly invested in.
So, I opened The Weekend Australian. I never got to the royal wedding preparations on page three.
On the front page the following words tore at my eyeballs:
‘Killer grandfather had acute depression’
(Confronting content ahead)
Suicide is the leading cause of death for people aged 14-44. Our prime minister is giving Lifeline (our suicide hotline) $34 million to:
‘dramatically boost staff numbers dealing with pleas for help. The funding to Lifeline comes as national suicide rates reach a 10-year high, with more than eight deaths a day.’ (Sunday Mail 6/05/18)
I don’t doubt the PM’s good intentions. It’s easy to look at those statistics and think:
‘Let’s throw some money at this problem.’
But injecting funds into the surface of such a complex issue and proudly announcing it to the media, is like patting the captain of the Titanic on the back, as water rushes into the hull of his ship, and saying:
‘Don’t worry. We’ve got this. We can see this huge iceberg is the problem. We’ve got people sitting on top of it, hacking it down. And, to distract everyone from the drama we can make snowcones from the ice that’s falling on the deck. Continue reading “Suicide Watch”
To anyone who is having suicidal thoughts or ideations, please call Lifeline (13 11 14) or your primary mental health care provider NOW. We need to keep you alive until you get better.
To anyone who is currently mentally unwell (but not suicidal) – conserve your energy for getting better, and return to this article when you are recovering or better. To everyone else – read on…
Thought Food 